Eloping would have been better

So my anniversary is coming up, it's in 3 days. While I love my husband our wedding sucked.

Here is why...

I planned my wedding in another state, it was only 2 hours away but you have no idea how much that 2 hours is when you're trying to plan something and you can't see things in person. Anyway, I had the colors picked out we were ready to go I could do it, I planned parties all of the time how much different could it really be? I delegated tasks for everyone, I was great at it.

Well as it turns out people decided that what I told them to do was not a good idea, so they went with their own idea of what they thought would look good. AKA - things no longer matched on the final day.

When I went to get my wedding dress I was turned away from 2 stores because of my age (I was 20) they told me "You can't afford anything here, we're not even going to show you our stock." I was like "You have no idea how much money I am able to spend, you just lost yourself a potential commission." I had the budget of $2,000 for my dress, which might not be as extravagant as some of those women on Say Yes to the Dress that spend like $25,000 on their gown, but I thought $2,000 was a decent amount of money.

I finally went to this little bridal store that was run out of someone's transformed garage, picked out a wedding dress that was $500 and too large for me in the original fitting. However, I was told I was fat and should get a girdle by the woman who was fitting the dress. (I was a size 10).

I would have ripped her a new one if my mom hadn't been standing there telling me to calm down. Secondly I ordered the bridesmaids dresses from her, but when they came in they were the wrong color. She blamed me for the mixup when I clearly was not at fault because I followed the swatch list that she gave me and had an e-mail to prove it. We couldn't get it fixed because by the time I got the dresses in it was 2 weeks from my wedding and it took at least 6 to get them in. So I just had to deal with it.

So now I'm fat, my dresses are wrong and unknowingly my decorations are all wrong. I was then told I couldn't have real flowers for my bridal bouquet or anyone in my bridal party because the church we were being married at didn't want to clean up flower petals. Seriously? Talk about lazy. Oh that's another thing, I wanted to get married outside, but no - it had to be inside...

So then it's like 2 days before my wedding all of my bridesmaids are coming in from various states; Indiana, North Carolina, Georgia, Pennsylvania, Ohio and so on. The only reason I had so many people on my side was because my husband insisted on having 8 guys on his side and I had to literally find people to fill up my side because I didn't have a desire to be friends with women at the time.

So I ask if the girls want to do something as a bachelorette party, nothing even too strenuous, just something nice like going out to dinner and a movie and getting our nails done. The answer was no. They wanted to do nothing. Even my fiancee went out, but nope. Not me.

The night before our wedding we all travel out to our destination location of the awesome town of Greenville, PA (aka not awesome). We do our wedding rehearsal and I'm the last one to leave the sanctuary because I was talking with someone about a minor detail (how I was supposed to walk up the aisle lol) and I come outside and everyone is in cars and my fiancee is standing at the back of the church looking angry.

"What's going on?" I asked
"They all decided to leave us here while they go out and see a movie and do whatever else they want to.... so we'll be setting up the reception hall by ourselves."
"Are you kidding me? What the heck? I thought the point of having a bridal party was so that they would help. I thought for one day they would be willing to go with us."

They all leave, I'm incredibly angry but thinking we can set up the reception hall ourselves in about an hour. We get to the reception hall and it smells like fish.
Not like a slight hint of "what is that?" but it smells like full on fried fish with fish and french fries on the floor from their Friday-night fish frys. The place was supposed to be cleaned up for us already and it wasn't. Everyone was sitting at the bar drinking and when we asked them who was cleaning it up they said "Not us, we're on break. We wont be doing it until tomorrow morning.' I said that does not work, at all. I was about to tell them off but my mother-in-law-to-be stopped me and said they were making our food and she didnt want them spitting in it. So my aunt-in-law-to-be decided to tell them off and we spent the next 3 hours cleaning and getting the fish smell out to set up for the next day.

Then we get a phone call from a bridesmaid saying "we can't find the hotel, can you come get me I have a really bad migraine." I said "Good, you deserve it, find your own damn way back." and hung up.

Somehow she found her way back to the hotel, when I get there she was laying in the room looking sick. I didn't care, why should I? Then she asks me if I can go to McDonalds for her.

Really? Like, seriously.. you're going to ditch me to clean the reception hall by myself while you're all out having fun and you want ME, the bride to do stuff for YOU... yeah, no. After 1/2 hour of her begging I finally got in my car and went and got her some food.

I got back, asked for help with my nails and got "well maybe when I'm done with mine." really? Nobody cares about you. This is MY day.

So now it's the wedding day, I get there and I hear bridesmaids complaining about having to stay for the reception because apparently they had other things planned for the day!

The air conditioner in the church broke and it's July, not only that but the windows in the sanctuary do not open and there were no fans. Great. Just what I needed.

As the wedding went on the guys - who were in tuxedos, were about to drop one by one. My dad almost passed out, my brother turned ghostly white and almost passed out, the best man was rushed to the hospital... it was awesome!

Then at the reception my cousin and friend who were both part of the wedding party decided it would be a good idea to take a walk before they announced the bridal party to enter the reception hall. We had no idea where they were, they were just gone. Apparently they liked each other or some stupid crap like that.

Nobody wanted to dance. It was like pulling teeth to get anyone to dance with me! I think for the dollar dances, I got a dollar.

Overall it was one of the most horrible experiences ever, but I have a wonderful husband whom I love. Just think before you have a wedding, because it's probably better to just elope and apologize later.

Cherise